Make a decision; Victim or Warrior?
Two approaches
Unfortunately,
all too often I hear Dyspraxic Adults complain. What especially surprises me is
that not only do they complain but also, they willingly put themselves into
‘the victim mode’. It begins with
negative phases such as’; ‘I can’t do this’, ‘there is no point in even trying
and of course the all too popular excuse ‘the dyspraxia made me do it’. The
phrases then influence how individuals see themselves, which affects their
behaviours and in turn limits abilities. By disabling ourselves we are further
compounding the belief that we are useless and have nothing to offer thus the
cycle of self-doubt, hopelessness and depression continues. It’s a classic
self-fulfilling prophecy; the more you tell yourself you are useless the more
useless you become.
We are all carrying a burden
Now, let me
stop you right there; all people with and without Dyspraxia and (I mean all people) have
weaknesses and strengths. All people struggle from time to time and no one and
I mean no one truly has it all sussed.
If anyone tells you they have got it all together, it is more than
likely they are lying to you. Don’t get
me wrong I am not one of those ‘if life gives you lemons make lemonade types’,
some people with this mind-set are ‘all sunshine and lolly pops’ even to the
point of impractical fakery. I wonder if you my fellow Dyspraxics have come
across people who act this way? That is until they have a problem to face. Once
a struggle comes their way it is like their whole world is falling apart but if
it’s happening to you they are telling you to be positive? The hypocrisy!
Turning things around
Anyway,
I’m speaking to you from the point of view of someone who was once a victim of
her Dyspraxia, but since 2012 I have been turning things round. I am not a
victim, I am not hopeless, and I do not use dyspraxia as an excuse not to try.
I have been speaking to various Dyspraxic adults who have achieved amazing
things, things that they never dreamed they could accomplish and some even go
as far as to say that they have achieved these things not despite their
Dyspraxia but because of their Dyspraxia!
I do not think it is either or, but sometimes an understandable lack of confidence, resources or opportunity - all affected by past experiences, family background, economic and social back ground and personal human potential.
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