Highlight The Hidden

Eyes wide open 

Not one, but many 

As an adult living with not one, but several hidden disabilities I face many challenges. fibro myalgia causes me pain, headaches and exhaustion on a daily basis. Credit where its due, it's never dull; I have different types of pain at different intensities on a daily basis and my mind and body are at war with each other. My body says "slow down your doing too much" but my mind tells me "come on, how slow are you, there are 90 year olds who would have got more done by now!"

 

What is ignorance and what makes it bliss? 

According to Wikipedia, (2018) "Ignorance is a lack of knowledge. The word ignorant is an adjective describing a person in the state of being unaware, and can be used to describe individuals who deliberately ignore or disregard important information or facts or individuals who are not aware of that important information or facts". All human beings are to an extent ignorant, for example you are ignorant as to what I was doing yesterday and I am ignorant of your favourite colour. It is not possible to know all and understand all because at the end of the day we are only human. The problem comes when we think we know and make decisions based on what we think rather then on actual facts.   

And what makes ignorance bliss you ask? Well ignorance is bliss for the person who is ignorant because it makes their life a bit easier. You see if you actually want to know and understand someone it means effort on your part. Let's think about it; getting to know someone, asking good questions and listening all demands effort, whereas if you are ignorant you can make it up as you go along and throw a few random facts and hey presto, job done!

               As you are already aware Dyspraxia is a hidden disability and a neurological condition. Now being that it is a Neurological condition it affects the brain which in turn affects all of the other aspects of your life. However, it's affects are not obvious you would have to spend a considerable amount of time really getting to know a person to see the affects of Dyspraxia. Same with regards depression and anxiety, the affects can be alarming. yet somehow they are naked to the human eye.  When people see someone with a crutch they realise their is a problem with their walking, when someone is spotted with a guide dog people realise that someone is blind. So, in some respects those living with disabilities that can be seen receive more patience and more understanding then those like myself who are living with invisible disabilities.  I remember a few months ago going on the bus with my walker and this old man ( who I think was probably deaf) bellowed " I didn't think people needed walkers just for being fat." All of the passengers were having a good stare at me and one or two of them had a laugh. I felt so small, I did not know where to look.

        So not only do I have to deal with pain, exhaustion and the constant battle between my body and my mind but I also have to deal with people's ignorance. Even people who have known me for years have judged me and dismissed the pain I am in as being psychological, made up and a cry for attention ! Let's be clear, I believe those who are suffering with mental health issues are not making it up and their challenges are as real as the challenges of a blind man. Only difference being the blind man's needs are obvious, whereas someone with depression and anxiety their needs are more hidden. The same applies to me, there are days when it's clear to see my mobility is affected so I need my walker, but there are days whereby I do not need my walker, that does not mean however, that I am no longer in pain, it just means my mobility has not been hindered. As I said before I am living with pain all the time and there are many others out there like me who are living with not one hidden disability but several and they too have to deal with ignorant people. I am of the opinion though that ignorance is probably one of the most disabling issues out there.

Our Responsibility 

The question is what can we do about it? After all people only believe what they want to believe and unfortunately human nature is as such that we do not truly emphasize with our fellow man unless we too are living in a similar situation. First we need to be honest and acknowledge that all individuals to a point are ignorant and that the choice is ours.  Do we remain ignorant or do we do something about it? We should learn about our illnesses and disabilities for ourselves and then practise explaining them. Do we fully understand what were saying and what it means? If we struggle to understand the information for ourselves how can we expect others to understand it?  To quote Einstein "any fool can do complicated". My dad use to tell me that when it comes to speaking to people it's important to bear in mind you don't know if they had a good night sleep, if they are not well and if they have any learning difficulties; so explain things like your talking to a five year old. He doesn't mean be patronising but rather to explain things in an easy to follow terms as oppose to long, drawn out and complicated.

Highlight the Hidden 

Once you fully understand the nature of your difficulties yourself you will be able to highlight the hidden. Bring it up in conversations when its appropriate, find accurate information in leaflets, books, webpages etc and share it. We can also highlight the hidden nature of our difficulties by giving examples of how your difficulties have affected you in everyday life. It also helps if you can laugh about it. Laughter helps break the ice and makes difficult subjects a little less taboo. Blogs, Facebook and YouTube are good platforms that you can use to raise awareness. I believe we need to do all we can to highlight the hidden. If you can make one person adjust and alter their way of thinking, that is one less person willingly ignorant and hopefully somewhere along the line that person will be that  bit kinder and more patient with someone else who is walking in our shoes.