Part 2, of seperating fact from fiction

The Most Dangerous Myth

Whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, we all discriminate, before I get stoned for my comment; allow me to explain. The word discriminate means to tell the difference. So if I was to indiscriminately cross the road, I would more then likely be dead by now. Being able to tell the difference enables us to make the right choices and avoid getting killed. Yes, I realise it sounds dramatic, but it is true. When we are looking for a partner we discriminate i.e. you may find people with ginger hair unattractive but find people with beards attractive. You can have that opinion as longs as   you regard the man who is bald with the same degree of respect and regard as you would the man with a thick bushy beard.  The problem is this, to discriminate in itself is not a bad thing but discrimination whereby your attitude and treatment of a person lowers because of their difference, is wrong. I have, over the years had to be more discriminate with regards the people who I hang around with. Being that my energy is in short supply I do not wish to donate it to people who would use and abuse it. I have less friends then I use to but that doesn't matter as the few friends I do have, 1; understand my needs, 2; do not demand anything too much of me and 3; they are worth investing my time and energy into. Whereas, when I was younger a friend, any friend would do! Chronic health conditions have a way of separating friends from shallow associates.  

Myth #2

This myth I believe is probably one of the most dangerous, and destructive myths that keeps popping up in the Dyspraxic community and that is the commonly held belief that Dyspraxia = useless.

I'm not saying living with Dyspraxia is a walk in the park, but even for those who are not Dyspraxic their life is not easy either. There will always be problems, there will always be challenges, there is no easy way out. So there are two options; we can either adhere to the belief that were useless and for everything we do wrong we can blame it on the Dyspraxia (a bit like a child having a paddy if you will, for example 'she made me do it!') and surrender to the belief of uselessness; allowing people to do the tasks in your place. Some Dyspraxics do not even want to be shown how to do things, even if its' in a clean cut, easier to follow way. This frustrates me, because 1. I know many talented and intelligent Dyspraxics that give of themselves and if they struggle using one method they will keep trying other methods, rather then give up. 2. I have had to push, push harder and push harder still to get anywhere. The results speak for themselves. Despite being told I would not be able to obtain; GCSE's I have done. I would never go to college; guess what, I have done and not only have I gone to college but I passed with flying colours! The Educational Psychologist also said that I would not be able to go to University... Guess what? That's right... I went to university.  If I had of believed those negative and false statements that the Educational Psychologist came out with, it would have been a self - fulfilling prophecy. I would not have done any of those things because I would have believed him when he said I couldn't. We have a lot to offer whether we are working or not we can still build others up!  

The alternative is to say, ok I have Dyspraxia; what is it, how does it affect me and how can I work around it? If your like me and you need practical strategies' to help you handle your Dyspraxia more effectively, I recommend you join Dyspraxic Adults Surviving in a none Dyspraxic world. It has proved itself more than useful.

Rage against the NTS'

Ready for the kind of person I discriminate against? Ever heard or been around any NT's? ( no not neuro-typicals') It's far worse! NT stands for 'Not Trying' Now before the politically correct amongst you  start sharpening your pitchforks, allow me to explain.  I am fully aware that no two people are the same and also regardless of whether or not I like someone, in God's eyes the people I like and dislike are worth the same as me and vice versa. with that belief strongly imprinted on my mind, I try to keep it there, regardless of how I think or feel towards a person. So, back to the point at hand          ( don't you just love these Dyspraxic Tangents?) My pet peeve, my king of all bug bares are none other then the NTs'.

You see NT's are the sort of people who are content to not try and they allow other people to do everything for them. I once knew a person who would blame every poor action and every in-action on his Dyspraxia. It appeared that this person had no independent will of his own and Dyspraxia was running the show.  After all, laziness is easy and comfortable why push yourself to try when someone else can do it? It really bothers me, bothers me to the point that I would cut off from people who live that way. Whereas, someone who is trying and tenacious I have time and energy for. After all, they own their Dyspraxia. We have Dyspraxia, Dyspraxia does not have us!

Strong convictions

Even though as a child, I initially accepted the verdict of the Educational Psychologist; as I was getting older and overcoming obstacles I decided that in whatever job I was to have in the future, I wanted to tell people( children or adults) that CAN  do it. Despite obstacles' and needing to go around things and even if an alternative route was going to take a longer period of time, so be it!

A conviction is a strongly held belief and stance. One of my convictions is that I need to build up Dyspraxics and help them to realise they can achieve, and that they can make a difference. We need to be responsible for how we live with Dyspraxia. Some Dyspraxics like to pretend it isn't there in the first place, whilst some head towards the opposite extreme and use Dyspraxia as an excuse for not  trying in the first place. This means a person is being ruled by the negative belief of 'I can't, so and so said ill get it wrong'. One of the things that separates us from animals is that we can Adapt. Being that life is precious and time flies do you really want to waste your time and become an NT??